Friday, September 28, 2007

Gimme Gimme Never Gets ..

Don't you know your manners yet . It seems that gimme does get as Britney's new comeback single heads to the top of the music charts . Despite her notorious VMA appearance ( or maybe because of it), Brtiney's new dance tune is numero uno on the Itunes site . You go girl . Just because you forget your undies once in a while does not mean you still can't sing and entertain us .Ma suggests getting the undies with the days of the week printed on them . Ma is rootin' for ya . I downloaded the single this morning to prove my loyalty and not just because we share the same last name either . My Daddy always said you were his love child . Keep on rockin' sis .

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Downward Dog

I am now into my 5th session of yoga and for anyone who is thinking of doing this I highly recommend it for stress and flexibility . The class my daughter and I take is called asanas yoga which consists of gentler stretching movements to improve the balance of mind and body . Our teacher has the candles lit and the soft music flowing and we are encouraged to leave all our troubles outside the door . One embarrASSing problem for some of us who enter into total relaxation is the unexpected flatulence that occurs almost every class . So far luck has been on my side even when my tummy is gurgling up a storm like last night . My daughter never fails to tell me later about the other gaseous incidences . At those times I find my deafness to be a plus . Entering into a pose like the downward dog with your butt in the air and the next person barely a few feet away , makes you extremely aware of doing anything cheeky . One time I felt like bursting into song just for the helluva of it . "Please release me , let me go ...." By the time an hour and half has passed we are into relaxation time and sometimes the sound of my teacher's voice and the lull of the music sends me off into la la land . ZZZZZZZ.
As far as the dog picture goes , I just thought you guys might enjoy the pose .. yoga or not .

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Stitches , Bitches , and Pee Pee Problems

Karma had her stitches out this morning and all is well . She has her virginity in tact and although a part of me still yearns for breeding her I know I did the right thing . Whenever I visit my vet and we talk dogs I can never get used to him using the term bitch for the female dog . I know that is the proper terminology but it makes me wince for some reason . Monday night at dog class , an older fellow came up to Karma and I and said .. "Nice bitch " . For a fleeting moment I thought he meant me . I almost felt like we could rap a bit about it all before class . "Yo , ya me and ma beetch , we gettin' it on for the mannnn ". I hip hopped out quietly .
This morning after the vet visit , I took Karma for a walk in a local park . There was just us and an old man on a rusted old bike . As the dog and I turned the corner what to our wandering eyes should appear but the old guy pissin' up against the wall of the little league building . I know that the older you get the harder it is to hold your water but why do the male of the species think nothing of whipping it out in public to relieve themselves . There were public toilets available . I remember breaking up with one of my old boyfriends in high school simply because after our date he peed in our boulevard . Excuse me , call me a prude but I think that is crude , rude and grounds for dismissal . If I want my grass watered I will use a hose .
And why does water running make you have to go ? Drinking water I can see ...but running water ? Does that mean every tourist at Niagara Falls needs a bathroom ? Does rain give you the urge ? I know , I know ..deep thoughts for mid week . Bathroom break .

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Fig My Newton

I just finished watching Wayne Newton on Dancing With The Stars and I was desperately embarASSed for him . It was not about the fact he never blinked or his eyelids were attached to the brow line ...or nary a gray hair on his black helmet moved . It was not even the fact that his girdle must have been killing him gently or his teeth blinded the judge's reasoning . Hello . For a Vegas icon surrounded by dancing queens ...hello ...he just had the worst fakey like dancing moves I ever saw on this show .
Hello . Was it just me ?
Danke scheon .

Family Ties

We are back safe and sound with precious memories of time well spent . The smell of autumn was in the air and the colors beginning their metamorphosis . My aunts were gracious hosts and I love them dearly . Listening to my father reminisce of days gone by with his sisters was a delight for me . I learned that just like the movie my Dad and his sisters had neighbors called the Faulkners . Loreena and Thelma Faulkner to be exact . This was a fun conversation by the way and you had to be there . Big Daddy had a night at Rama where he won a 60 dollar jackpot and Martha's blue eyes sparkled with dollar signs . We shopped , we ate , we laughed , we cried, we hugged , we slept in and the best part of all was the joy of spending time with my family . I am so proud to be a small branch on this family tree. May it stay forever rooted in my heart and the hearts of my children.
Go hug your tree today .

Three Guys and a Stove ...not us ...( the name of the great eatery in Huntsville .)
The Orillia aunt and crew .
My aunt realizes that when you have over 1000 unopened emails that you cannot receive any more .
Cousin Jeff becomes *Always Fresh * .
A family meal at Tall Trees in Huntsville . The pickerel was deeelish .
The Huntsville aunt and crew .....have no idea why our butts are in the air.
..and yes there is a jacuzzi story behind the photo ..let's just call it Big Daddy and the vino .
Cheers to a great trip!

Saturday, September 15, 2007

"On The Road Again..."

"...makin' music with my friends ". Tomorrow morning I am on the road again ( not with Willy ) but with my daughter , my Dad , and his lady friend . We are taking a little road trip to Huntsville and then Orillia where my father's two sisters ( my aunts live ) . It has been a few years since we have connected and I feel a happy get together to talk about the old days and catch up on life is in order . Everyone is getting on in years and as we all know only too well that time stops for no man . My Aunt Ruth in Huntsville is a beautiful and kind woman who took care of her niece ( c'est moi ) many times in my youth . I have always been proud that I share her name . I admired her flare for fashion and emulated her as much as I could . My Aunt Viv in Orillia is a very funny person and reminds me of the female version of my father . She is also hearing impaired and recently has lost sight in one of her eyes . Despite those setbacks , she laughs the loudest and makes each day count . My aunts will meet my father's friend Martha for the first time . I know she will fit right in like an old shoe ..or better yet a sexy stiletto . When the Spears family tree gets going , the jokes and memories fill your heart up with love and laughter . We dance way better than Britney and sing off key like fools . Time to pack . Time to laugh . Time to make time .
.." and I can't wait to get on the road again ."

Thursday, September 13, 2007

To Spay or Not to Spay

..... that is the question . Well of course I knew the right answer to that was to spay, so why was I having second thoughts on this . Let me clarify . Karma was entering her second heat and she was 13 months old . I knew it had to be done . The thought of giving her pain and cutting into her hairy little tummy was making me feel sick . I was not planning on breeding her . Finding responsible homes for puppies is a serious undertaking . That is best left to the experts . I knew all this and still I hesitated . Why ? How fast a year goes by . It seems like yesterday we were potty training and learning how to sit and stay . She has grown into a beautiful dog with a loving personality . She rarely barks at the door , just sits looking at you with that goofy grin of hers . When you come home she rubs around your legs more like a cat then a german shepherd . She even smiles . She never really grew too big . In fact , she is a little runty. Her best friend is Cocoa , the shih tzu next door. She loves her big brother True . One ear is still weak at times but now I find it more endearing than worrying over it . She is who she is . I am watching her sleep at this moment , whimpering once in a while . She hurts . She was spayed yesterday .
I think I know the answer to that why ... when you love something , you hurt along with them.

Friday, September 07, 2007


Sometimes you need to take two of these and just go back to bed .

Thursday, September 06, 2007

The Elusive Birdie

One guess where the elusive red headed wood pecker went ......

Wednesday, September 05, 2007